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Turning Resolutions Around
I have a love-hate relationship with New Year's Resolutions. I love setting them, and I hate that sinking feeling of failure, come about February.
This year, my father-in-law suggested that resolutions in general tend to be a bit, well, self-centered. They're focused mainly on our own wants, needs and desires. Considering how my goals might benefit someone else could give me additional motivation.
So I'm thinking more broadly about what's important in 2010, and trying to turn my resolutions around.
For instance, I like remembering birthdays, even if I can't afford to send a gift. In 2010, I'd like to send greetings to each of my siblings, siblings-in-law and nieces and nephews on time.
Instead of defining this resolution in terms of myself--the organized, thoughtful, and creative sibling who remembers important events, I'm framing it differently.
I love my family. I'm the youngest of five children and I have close ties to my brothers and sisters. There is a span of 12 years between my oldest sister and myself, yet we run a website together and talk and email regularly about kids and parenting and our own challenges.
By taking a few minutes to write a card, send a bar of chocolate, or make a phone call, I'm expressing gratitude for my relationships, and for the role others have played in my life.
I'm planning to apply this philosophy to all the goals I have in mind for this year. Turning a resolution around gives it more meaning; when a goal involves human connections, it becomes more than simply another to-do. I'm also less likely to feel stressed and procrastinate if I'm motivated by my feelings for others, and not by a check mark on a task list.
